We all aim to please. We always want to make sure people like us, trust us, and respect us. And what better way to do that, then to say yes to whatever favors and invitations they send our way? The more we can do for other people, the better they’ll see us, right?
We need to say no sometimes. It would be impossible to do everything that was asked of us. Imagine if you never said “no” in your entire life. Not only would you become tired of constantly trying to please people, but they might begin to see you as someone they can constantly rely on. They would then take you for granted, and you would only continue to enable them.
But, what if you don’t want to be rude or you don’t want to disappoint them?
There’s a difference between saying no because you actually can’t handle something, and saying no because in order to be rude. And I feel like a lot of it has to do with how you say it. Maybe saying “no” flat out isn’t the best in some scenarios. In those cases, it might be easier to say something along the lines of, “sorry, I can’t” or “I don’t really have time.” Those aren’t as harsh as saying no, but it still gets the point across, and hopefully, the person you’re talking to will understand why you’re saying no without you having to explain yourself.
Your number one focus in your life is yourself. While it is great to help others, you also need to think about what you need as well. Does saying yes to all of those extra tasks at work make yourself feel like a zombie by the end of the day? Try to limit how much extra you take on on top of your existing workload. Is saying yes to hanging out with your friends every weekend starting to wear on you? Pass on the invitation next time and have a day to yourself to recharge. Your life needs balance.
It’s okay to turn down something because you don’t have the time or aren’t feeling up to it. At the end of the day, you need to take care of yourself. And if saying no to some things is what you need to do, then, by all means, go for it.